Talk About It
Ask for support from people who care about you and who will listen to your concerns. Receiving support and care can be comforting and reassuring. Your campus is likely to be offering support services through its counseling center. It often helps to speak with others who have shared your experience so you do not feel so different or alone. If your parents seem particularly distressed, it may be because they are reacting to their own sense of not being able to control the college environment to keep you as safe as they would like.
Strive For Balance
When a tragedy occurs, it’s easy to become overwhelmed and have a negative or pessimistic outlook. Balance that viewpoint by reminding yourself of people and events which are meaningful and comforting, even encouraging. Striving for balance empowers you and allows for a healthier perspective on yourself and the world around you.
Turn It Off and Take A Break
You may want to keep informed, but try to limit the amount of news you take in whether it’s from the internet, television, newspapers or magazines. While getting the news informs you, being overexposed to it can actually increase your stress. The images can be very powerful in reawakening your feeling of distress. Also, schedule some breaks to distract yourself from thinking about the incident and focus instead on something you enjoy. Try to do something that will lift your spirits.
Honor Your Feelings
Remember that it is common to have a range of emotions after a traumatic incident.
Go a little easy on yourself and on your friends. You may experience intense stress similar to the effects of a physical injury. For example, you may feel exhausted, sore, or off balance.
Different Individuals, Different Reactions
Keep in mind that people possess very highly individualized personalities – we come from different cultural backgrounds and represent a wide spectrum of social, ethnic, and religious/spiritual perspectives – and it is also important to appreciate that many often carry very unique and sometimes negative past experiences or traumata that may resonate with the recent critical incident, and some negative emotions and feelings may therefore be "reactivated" by it. It is therefore essential to pay attention to the differences and vulnerabilities we all possess - even if we don’t know precisely what they may be - and be open to letting people respond to the recent events in their own fashion.
Take Care of Yourself
Engage in healthy behaviors to enhance your ability to cope with excessive stress.
Eat well-balanced meals, get plenty of rest, and build physical activity into your day. Avoid alcohol and drugs because they can suppress your feelings rather than help you to manage and lessen your distress. In addition, alcohol and drugs may intensify your emotional or physical pain. Establish or reestablish routines such as eating meals at regular times and following an exercise program. If you are having trouble sleeping, try some relaxation techniques, such as deep breathing, meditation, or yoga.
Help Others or Do Something Productive
Find out from your university or community how you can help people who have been affected by this incident, or have other needs. Helping someone else often has the benefit of making you feel better, too. Try volunteering at your school or within your community.
If You Have Recently Lost Friends in This or Other Tragedies
Remember that grief is a long process. Give yourself time to experience your feelings and to recover. For some, this might involve staying at home; for others it may mean getting back to school or work. Dealing with the shock and trauma of such an event will take time. It is typical to expect many ups and downs, including "survivor guilt"—feeling bad that you escaped the tragedy while others did not.
For many people, using the tips and strategies mentioned above may be sufficient to get through the current crisis. At times, however an individual can get stuck or have difficulty managing intense reactions. A licensed mental health professional can assist you in developing an appropriate strategy for moving forward. It is important to get professional help if you feel like you are unable to function or perform basic activities of daily living. Your university or college counseling center may be a good place to start.
Recovering from such a tragic event may seem difficult to imagine. Persevere and trust in your ability to get through the challenging days ahead. Taking the steps in this guide can help you cope at this very difficult time.
This adaptation is by courtesy of the American Psychological Association
